A friend suggested that I write about the last year. So this afternoon, I had a quick type. Opinions? Any advice?
The prison cell was crispy cold, despite the summer heat outside. Shivering but I know I’m safer here than out on the streets. Especially tonight.
Humiliating searches but I’m beyond caring by then. Better than there, I tell myself.
Worst is the separation. All I want is to be with my fiancé, at least speak to him.
He must be panicking that I’m not home yet.
I wish I had a jacket.
TWO YEAR EARLIER
Shaking with nerves, I painted on my stage make-up. The first audition. I knew that my fiancé Brendon was sitting out there, with a handful of money, to get the crowd started, but I’m still terrified.
Want to vomit.
“Celeste, you’re up after this song” called the dance manager.
ohshitohshitoshit
Thank goodness Id practiced in my 6 inch stripper heels, before this first night of terror.
Quick mirror check, then I strode confidently to the dressing room exit. Look the part, and act the part, and maybe I wont feel like passing out.
The music fades and then: “Thankyou to the lovely Layla, guys. She’s available for a private show, if you think you can handle her one on one.”
“And now” announced the Dj “Sexy Celeste, fresh from her all girls boarding school. Let’s hear it for her”
My music starts to pump, Marilyn Manson. Deep breath and walk up the stage stairs.
***
Still shaking, adrenaline is my friend. Smiling I sashay tentatively towards the pole and dance around it a few times. Ok here goes, interact with the people.
Butt up against the pole I drop my hands to the floor and slide to my knees. Brendon wolf whistles and waves money.
What a darling.
Crawling slowly towards him I winked at the young surfer stereotype, who was trying to get my attention. Or look up my dress. It’s always hard to tell. “Ill be back honey” I hope that was a sexy murmur.
At the tipping rail, I swung my legs around and rested my heels on Bren’s shoulders, while he stuffed a $10 note in my garter. Wriggle around a bit. Then spin again and lean out facing him. My head close to his “God I love you”
He stuffs another $10 down my bra “This is fun” he replied, grinning in a smartarse way. I shoved my boobs in his face for a second, and then shifted my weight back onto the stage.
I moved his tip to my garter and successfully stood up, at the same time.
Back to the surfer guy. I danced in front of him for a couple of seconds, then slid my dress off. I squatted down in front of him and leant over close, so he could slip me the $5 note he was holding. “Thanks sweetie!” Snap back to standing and the music changes. Fast and hard.
I rush to the pole, throw myself at it, and do a quick spin before spotting Mr $50 note. Beeline for him, I smiled and maintained eye contact as I neared. The $50 went into my garter and I leaned out over the rail, and put my arms on his shoulders.
“Hey honey, how are you tonight?”
“Good thanks, Celeste.”
I reached over and grabbed his hand, then guided it to my back.
“Undo the bra for me?”
He expertly unclipped my bra and slid the straps down my arms. I stayed up close, blocking the other guy’s views and shimmied a little. Wriggle a bit, slide out over him.
Oh shit, my last song.
“See you soon hon” I slid back across the stage on my knees, and from the ground swung around the pole until I had enough momentum to stand.
Quick learners, this bunch. Two more $50’s being waved, one on either side of the stage. I did a brisk circuit, making my boobs bounce then stopped at one of the tippers.
On to my butt and legs out onto his lap.
“Take the g-string off!” He exclaimed.
“Sorry sweetie? Did I hear a please?”
“Please!” Slipped a second $50 into my garter. Ok, $100 for full nude seems fair. Balls of my feet pushing on his legs I bridged my body, and slid the last remaining cloth out from under my butt. Tease and tease, then down with the G. I swung around, back inside my tipping rail, and struggled briefly to free my shoes from the black lace.
Quick legs open for my big tipper, winked at the guy next to him, who was trying to get another $10 into my garter, if I were still enough. Better circle again. I leant out and gave Mr $100 a quick hug, then danced around the stage, collecting my tips.
I reached the other $50 punter, and slid to the ground for some R rated legs open work. He tipped me then called “Can I get a dance?”
“Or course honey, Ill be back after my stage, ok?”
He nodded OK.
My song was ending, so I quickly grabbed my things and gave a quick bow.
The next dancer smiled at me, as we passed, she was dressed as an angel for her stage set.
Backstage, deep breaths.
Still want to vomit.



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