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Thread: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

  1. #1
    Featured Member teeth_of_the_hydra's Avatar
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    Default I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    Hi guys. I love you and I am really nervous and weird feeling because I think I just had one tiny revelation today.

    And that revelation was that I don't like stripping.

    I mean, I guess I've known it for a while. The way that I avoid it and make excuses so I don't have to go into work pretty much speaks volumes for how I feel about it... and yet, for months I've still told myself things like, "Well, there's no point in going in today because it's a Tuesday in August, and it'll be dead, but I'll want to go in Friday because I'll be able to make money." Then Friday would come and it would be, "But it's still the slow season here, so I'll wait til next week because that's one week closer to being tourist season." And then the next week it would be something else. And so on ad nauseum. A lameass confession is that I haven't gone into the club since late July. I've had another job this whole time, which occupies about 30 hours a week. It pays pretty well, and I can afford to get by, but there's no benefits and no upward mobility, so it's not a totally super-duper job. Also, now that I'm done with school, working 30 hours a week is not nearly enough to keep me busy. It's funny, because the job does not tire me out. Rather, it invigorates me; I'd be happy to have twice as many hours just so I felt busier. It's a strange contrast to stripping, which requires so much OTC "work" of hair, nails, wardrobe, gym, rest, recuperation, ranting, etc.

    But I'm actually not posting to talk on about my other job... the above paragraph was really just a lengthy justification for how I'm not actually lazy, and I don't actually hate working, I just hate working as a stripper. I dislike talking to people. I hate feigning interest. I hate lying, but telling the truth about myself has proven terribly alienating... no one wants a dance from someone whose extracurricular activities consist of reading the thesaurus and searching for the perfect bagel recipe. I don't mind being uncool, or brainy, or reserved, but it's terribly incompatible with the job.

    So anyway, my point is this. I just want absolution from you guys. I want someone to say that it's okay to walk away from this profession, that I can sell my clothes, my shoes, that I can stop stressing myself out with promises of how "I'm going to go into work any night now, I mean it," and just move on with my life. I can get another job-- any number of them, right?-- and I'll still be able to support myself, and it won't make me less of a person or mean that I'm weak or lame or suck or a loser.

    But I only want you to tell me this if you think it's true. If you really think what I need is a swift kick in the ass, well heck, I suppose I ought to hear that instead.
    Drought was over. Where was I? Drinks were on the house.
    For mixers, my love, you'd poured--what?--even the rain.

  2. #2
    Lola Rose
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    well. I think it's fine, and i admire you.

    but make sure you keep an outfit or 2, just in case.

  3. #3
    cameron_keys
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    If you dont like it and you dont need the money...then dont do it. Why would you? This job has an expiration date(for most people!) and you have come to yours.

    Beleive me..I feel the same you do...I have to DRAG myself there and I only go 1-2 times a week now. As soon as I dont need the money anymore I'm done...I'm burnt out.


    And if you want something to do...come visit me!!!



    ps: HA! I just saw you quoted me!LOL!!!

  4. #4
    Featured Member needtodance's Avatar
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    Why would it make you less of a person to walk away from somethinig you dont like? You need to do what makes you feel fulfilled, NOT push yourself for that extra year of dancing money.

    Kudos to you for having a viable option for hte moment!You have a normal job waiting, even if its not PERFECT.... A good jumping point.
    Onward to better things!

    (but I'll miss you if you stop dropping by here!)

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    God/dess scarlett_vancouver's Avatar
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    It's OK to not love stripping! It's more than Ok to not want to strip anymore. It's commendable that you've realized it, and are going to do something about it.


    Feature costumes for sale!

  6. #6
    Lola Rose
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    um, but it's not ok for you to leave sw.

    just to clairify....

  7. #7
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    ^^^ DEFINITELY that.

    It is totally okay... though I do think location might have a lot to do with it. Florida and L.A. are stressful environments for strippers. If you ever get the urge to blow off some dancing steam sometime, you could always just take a strip trip to a less stressful club. But if you absolutely hate it and never want to do it again, of course that's perfectly okay. Why wouldn't it be?

  8. #8
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    Yeah Wife, you are not allowed to leave

    It's perfectly fine to decide you just aren't going to do it anymore. I felt the same way when I retired. I knew it was for the best when I had the opportunity to go back and I talked myself out of it with excuses.

    Do what you want to do.

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    Moderator Optimist's Avatar
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lola Rose View Post
    um, but it's not ok for you to leave sw.

    just to clairify....

    ^^^^^^^^^^^^Yeah! My sentiments exactly!

    You gotta do your thing and it's so ok that you're ready to change. We all hang up the stilletttos at some point!
    “What a caterpillar calls the end of the world we call a butterfly.” - ECKHART TOLLE

  10. #10
    sun child
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    I hate stripping sometimes as well. I haven't worked in a while now like about three weeks. Don't be ashamed to admit that stripping sucks. There's so many mind fucks involved. You know.

    I say take a break. If you feel like going back or need cash or something then go back. At least you know that you can always dance your way out of insane situations with your stripper survival skillz.

  11. #11
    Picaresque
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    *hug*. It's understandable, I hate it too right now. There's nothing wrong with leaving, not at all. Why suffer through something you don't like, especially if you're in a good position with your other job and you don't *have* to be there in the first place?

    Don't sell off your outfits or shoes though. You might possibly regret it later. Who knows, after a nice long break you might find yourself wanting to go back sometime down the road, even if only for one shift a week or a few nights while in another city or something.

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    God/dess holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    I think your post was exciting! It sounds so liberating to be done, at least to me. I'm looking forward to a "normal" job someday myself, I think I have one more year in me...I gotta make 6 figures...

    But I feel like congratulating you. I guess because it's always good to recognize when you need change and then move forward accordingly.
    I'm confused, but the Chewbacca Truffle Shuffle cleared it up. - Emily

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    God/dess
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    You don't need our validation!


    but you have it, of course.

    I agree with many of the things you said, but with one crucial difference -- I like stripping. I'm an introvert, it goes against my nature, and I'm uncool, brainy, and reserved. But for some reason there's a part of me that's gratified by acting like the complete opposite of what I am.

    So. Since you lack that part of you and it's a strain, don't do it anymore. Change is good.

    however, I'm sad that I won't get to see you dance when I come to Sarasota this winter.

  14. #14
    Featured Member francescadubois's Avatar
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    Someone said this to me a long time ago, and I absolutely agree with it:

    "Better for you to leave the club before the club leaves you."

    So congratulations. You're walking on your own terms and not being forced out. I think that's pretty damn awesome.
    "I came in like a lamb, but I intend to leave like a lion."

    -Sade
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    The only thing a person hates more than being a sex object, is NOT being a sex object.
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    Featured Member teeth_of_the_hydra's Avatar
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    Thanks guys. You always say the best things, all of you. I am pretty excited to be moving forward... I just got my college diplomas in the mail today, my final acceptance into a NOLS outdoor educator course is pending, and I suppose I have a couple of months to find a decently paying service-industry job, just to keep my nights occupied, and take advantage of winter season money somehow.

    It's funny how it is making me sad a little bit to acknowledge that I'm leaving this all behind. Ha, with my waffley-ass track record, I could be back on the pole by this time next week. But for now I'm letting myself off the hook and not stewing about whether or not I'm going into work tonight. Right now I'm just a chick who works at an art school. Just a regular chick with a regular job. Yah. Whoa.

    Oh, and I'm not going to stop posting here. I need the vicarious thrill, or else I might spend my limited income on local real-life strippers to get my fix or something.
    Drought was over. Where was I? Drinks were on the house.
    For mixers, my love, you'd poured--what?--even the rain.

  16. #16
    Featured Member Cassandra39's Avatar
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    You may feel a big relieve once you let yourself stop, and in this case just go in when you really want to.
    There is a huge difference between HAVING to go and WANTING to.
    For example... once I've worked my 4 days a week the rest are just bonus. Because I don't have to, I actually kinda want to go because I know it's just extra.
    If you are truely burnt out then quitting might be best.
    I do agree though... keep a pair of shoes and bikini around just in case!

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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    Quote Originally Posted by teeth_of_the_hydra View Post
    ... no one wants a dance from someone whose extracurricular activities consist of reading the thesaurus and searching for the perfect bagel recipe. I don't mind being uncool, or brainy, or reserved, but it's terribly incompatible with the job.
    Untrue! I totally understand stopping, I've done it myself a few times, but there are people who want a dance from the uncool, brainy girl. I've had some great Ld/convos from blurting out "Ooo, nice Punisher shirt" or whatever. Not that it's the first thing I bring up, but I live my life way over in Dork-ville. You might also do a lot better in a more college-centered area of the country. Or you might just be out, and good for you! I'm just saying.

    (and I like your posts, too, so don't go away)

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    God/dess Chrissy68's Avatar
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    ^ agreed. totally had many a dorky convos (because im a dork, and geeky custies and dorky me communicate well, lol). but TOTH, i respect your decision greatly. i find it invigorating in a sense that i might be living vicariously through. i recently went thru a i must quit period, and while for me it was a 2-wk period, for you it sounds more like a revelation about your life. and the way you want to live it. i greatly admire that; i greatly hope that you succeed in whatever you put your mind to, because i think you're just that cool.

    but, i echo what susan said, you don't need our validation! but of course, you have it. cameron is also right, there is a expiration date in this profession for most, and it def. sounds like this is yours. im totally glad you recognized it instead of burning yourself out longer.

    Love it!

  19. #19
    God/dess Dottie Rebel's Avatar
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    You know, I was just thinking this to myself today: "It's ok to not want to be a stripper." That would be a pretty funny statment to a civilian, but for us hard-core hustle SW gals it is just short of sacrilege. The hell, you say!

    But it's true. It's OK.

    I'm there right now, too. I will work my ass off. I am not lazy. But I just can't do *this* job anymore. I need someone to stare at ME longing and laugh at MY stupid jokes and make ME feel cool and sexy and entertain ME and help ME relax. Doing that for someone else right now is just beyond my capability.

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    Featured Member saphire123456's Avatar
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    <-- i agree, stripping def takes a lot out of you both physically and emotionally-the endless mind games, pretending to like every fat smelly guy w/ a wallet... i've been in semi burnout for 2 years now, where i can't possibly make myself go to work more than 2/ week. But to play devil's advocate-who said you have to like work anyway? (that's why it's called work) the way i think about it is i'd rather suck it up for 10/hrs a week and have the rest of the time to pursue my other interests, than to work 40 hrs a week for less... but as was said above, everyone has their stripper experation date...don't throw out your dancing shoes yet thou

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    God/dess Embyr's Avatar
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    (i have nothing more to add that hasn't already been said), except- it's fine... we remake ourselves a million times during our life, trying on and discarding certain labels as we transform and expand... you are simply shedding a skin to move onto something else. No need to get wrapped up in the symbolic representativeness of it all... and remember, just because you're hanging up your heels doesn't mean you must hang them up for good... nor does it mean we don't want you to be here and partake of SW!!! So good for you for doing what makes YOU happy in life and recognizing when the time is right to acknowledge emotional/professional dynamism and embrace change.

  22. #22
    Chicagoeditor
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    Of course you can walk away. But whatever you do, DON'T leave SW! I quite enjoy your "uncool, brainy, reserved" attitude.

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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    What outfits do you have to get rid of? Maybe I want some!


    ETA: You do what you feel is right. If you're not into stripping anymore there's no reason to keep doing it. I have always said there are waaaayyy too many girls hating life because they dance despite the fact they don't like it. This is NOT the sort of job you should do if you don't like it. Too many people feel stuck in jobs they hate, and I think that is sad.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  24. #24
    God/dess kryssy's Avatar
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    I too hate dancing right now, but it is taking car of my family so that's what matters the most to me. Hopefully in the very near future I will not have to dance anymore and can get a part time job that I really like doing!!

  25. #25
    Lola Rose
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    Default Re: I think I am not going to be a stripper anymore.

    Quote Originally Posted by Susan Wayward View Post
    You don't need our validation!


    but you have it, of course.

    I agree with many of the things you said, but with one crucial difference -- I like stripping. I'm an introvert, it goes against my nature, and I'm uncool, brainy, and reserved. But for some reason there's a part of me that's gratified by acting like the complete opposite of what I am.

    So. Since you lack that part of you and it's a strain, don't do it anymore. Change is good.

    however, I'm sad that I won't get to see you dance when I come to Sarasota this winter.
    yay!!! susan! We should go on a double date for dinner

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