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Thread: What *IS* Fellatio?

  1. #1
    madmaxine
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    Default What *IS* Fellatio?

    Fascinating article....Discuss.



    Edit to add- I was "fascinated" in a bad way- I am apparently in the minority of women who think fellating is a fine and normal activity.

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    Last edited by madmaxine; 10-05-2007 at 01:05 AM.

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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Hm.

    She wasn't being very consistent, was she?

    Is fellatio a good way for a girl to "instantly please" a boy? Or is it "hard labor, in every sense of the word?"

    Is it far more "complex" and "intimate" than coitus, or is it "sterile," "trite" and "expedient"?

    Maybe I'm too exhausted to think straight, but I didn't get any sort of cogent point from that essay. Did you?
    "Doc still loved true things, but he knew it was not a general love and it could be a very dangerous mistress." - John Steinbeck, Cannery Row


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  3. #3
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    IMO she's saying that fellatio is having a redux....Like, a way overdue revival. I can stand for that (or kneel, tee hee.)

    I do wonder why the Lewinsky blowjob is discussed in fiduciary terms..? Was there a payoff we didn't hear about? Sadly "besmirched reputation" is the most prominent outcome for Monica Lewinsky.

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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    "...nesting one's face in the musty, doughy pelt of your partner's loins; bringing the full force of your tongue, lips, teeth (indeed, your entire face) to bear on the swollen, supplicant shaft; coaxing the salty swell of seed-bearing spermatozoa burgeoning from deep within the vulnerable, fuzz-laced scrotum..."

    Wow, that's some serious shit there.

    I want to go back to college and learn to write like that--you think I can learn to? Should I start a thread about proper instruction methods? Will a bunch of women PM me if I do?
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    I think it's funny that she quoted "Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man," that's one of my favorite sex manuals.

    And I really hope she's exaggerating about the bj being the "goodnight kiss" for teenagers today. Not that there's anything wrong with it in and of itself, but you sure don't hear about the girl getting hers anywhere in there.

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    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Good point.

    And I don't buy it that the average kid has either given or received 50-60 BJs, as she intimates the NY Times article means.
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Quote Originally Posted by Andygirl View Post
    And I really hope she's exaggerating about the bj being the "goodnight kiss" for teenagers today. Not that there's anything wrong with it in and of itself, but you sure don't hear about the girl getting hers anywhere in there.
    It's clear that she's really basing this on her personal feelings toward the subject and how the past kind of supports them more than today's world. Which is fine, it's just her opinion, and she's clearly on the fence about it.


    This quote colored the whole article for me because it makes her seem like she's pleading for understanding as how women today can be so confident about it so early on. You really expect to see this paragraph start with: I never expected this to happen to ME but...
    The first blow job I ever gave (after methodically groping my way past all the bases) was an act of faith. After finally figuring out how to manually manage my boyfriend's strange vestigial organ -- how to brandish, manipulate and handle his distended, tumescent pink love shaft -- I now had the daunting task of having to figure out how to manage it orally. Lick? Suck? Use your hands? If only the how-to books that exist today existed back then.
    It was further colored by her personal hangups when she goes on to make a case for intimacy as a standard when it's really just her opinion.

    It's O.K. really, and sexuality in any case among teens is a concern and should be handled appropriately by education and proper parenting, but we're in an age where we're becoming more less inclined to to do things slow and right and achieve the faster turn around. Is it any real surprise that kids these days are learning from us? Try to get all of the benefits with as little investment as possible?
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Quote Originally Posted by Djoser View Post
    "...nesting one's face in the musty, doughy pelt of your partner's loins; bringing the full force of your tongue, lips, teeth (indeed, your entire face) to bear on the swollen, supplicant shaft; coaxing the salty swell of seed-bearing spermatozoa burgeoning from deep within the vulnerable, fuzz-laced scrotum..."

    Wow, that's some serious shit there.

    I want to go back to college and learn to write like that--you think I can learn to? Should I start a thread about proper instruction methods? Will a bunch of women PM me if I do?

    I promise to PM after you get your degree/certificate in that writing style
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Quote Originally Posted by Djoser View Post
    Good point.

    And I don't buy it that the average kid has either given or received 50-60 BJs, as she intimates the NY Times article means.

    I was...well I...got around when I was younger...but I slept with more guys than I gave BJ's to. I know with sex their inside you and all...but oral sex is just more intimate to me. I can count on one hand how many guys I've gone down on...but I can't how many I've slept with. Its not that I don't like it...but hell if I'm only in it for the sex we're doing something thats gonna feel good for me to!
    Am I the only person like that?


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  10. #10
    Jay Zeno
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Man, I just had a resurgent moment of watching Clerks, where the girlfriend is telling the boyfriend how few sexual partners she's had. The blowjobs didn't count. There were 36... errrr, 37 of them.

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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    humans may be the only animals that give blow jobs.
    Ok, I havn't read this article yet, but I know this definately isn't true. My friend's chihuaha used to felate her kitty. They were best friends (with benefits it seems )

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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    Ok, I havn't read this article yet, but I know this definately isn't true. My friend's chihuaha used to felate her kitty. They were best friends (with benefits it seems )
    LMFAO!

    That must have been...um...interesting...akward...I dunno.


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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    Ok, I havn't read this article yet, but I know this definately isn't true. My friend's chihuaha used to felate her kitty. They were best friends (with benefits it seems )
    K, are ALL your pets sex fiends?
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Quote Originally Posted by francescadubois View Post
    K, are ALL your pets sex fiends?
    Hahaha, no those pets are not mine. They belong to my friend. She brought them home together when they were babies and they instantly bonded. Somewhere in the process of grooming each other, they discovered 69. Now they are grown, and I'm not sure if they do it anymore. Plus, the cat has gotten HUGE and the chihuaha stayed tiny. I don't know what that has to do with anything, they are just super-duper cute.

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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Quote Originally Posted by Jay Zeno View Post
    Man, I just had a resurgent moment of watching Clerks, where the girlfriend is telling the boyfriend how few sexual partners she's had. The blowjobs didn't count. There were 36... errrr, 37 of them.

    I know, I thought about that too, right away.

    "Try not to blow anyone on the way to the parking lot!"

    That's one of the best lines, ever...


    Quote Originally Posted by Taylorlila
    I was...well I...got around when I was younger...but I slept with more guys than I gave BJ's to. I know with sex their inside you and all...but oral sex is just more intimate to me. I can count on one hand how many guys I've gone down on...but I can't how many I've slept with. Its not that I don't like it...but hell if I'm only in it for the sex we're doing something thats gonna feel good for me to!
    Am I the only person like that?
    It makes sense to me, sure...
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Quote Originally Posted by Nicolina View Post
    ..but I didn't get any sort of cogent point from that essay. Did you?
    There didn't seem to be much more then to say that in the not to distant past, people in our culture viewed oral sex as more intimate then intercourse, where today it seems the opposite is becoming the case. Beyond that, there doesn't seem to be much. Societies and what's in and out changes. Known, hardly surprising, I guess the author thought this would be good stuff for an article? /shrug

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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    I always find it odd when people refer to oral as not "real sex" Like, to quote Dan Savage "You're rolling around on a bed, giving each other orgasms...what the fuck is it, parcheesi?"

    Ahahahaha....

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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    It's clear that she's really basing this on her personal feelings toward the subject and how the past kind of supports them more than today's world
    Agreed.

    Plus, her perception of active vs. passive roles in fellatio and whether or not women feel obligated to do it (as opposed to wanting to do it) seem like an attempt to make an inherently submissive act (on the part of the giver) less so, as if there was something wrong with that.
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Quote Originally Posted by Circe View Post
    "You're rolling around on a bed, giving each other orgasms...what the fuck is it, parcheesi?"
    I don't know who he is, but that's funny. And it's so true--otherwise, lesbians would never have sex, and we know what the answer to that non-existent dilemma is.

    Why would a guy count as 'having sex" his 15 second 'pop the weasel' act of penetration with some poor deprived woman he cajoled into going along with it, but not an extended climactic tradeoff by other means, is beyond me.
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Quote Originally Posted by Djoser View Post
    "...nesting one's face in the musty, doughy pelt of your partner's loins; bringing the full force of your tongue, lips, teeth (indeed, your entire face) to bear on the swollen, supplicant shaft; coaxing the salty swell of seed-bearing spermatozoa burgeoning from deep within the vulnerable, fuzz-laced scrotum..."

    Wow, that's some serious shit there.
    Actually, it's pretty damn awful shit, but you knew that already. How can editors not spot the difference between forced, overwrought, cheesy, lame writing like "the salty swell of seed-bearing spermatozoa" and the other side of the world where real erotica resides? There is a very thin line between hysterically funny and the genuinely erotic.

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    Should I start a thread about proper instruction methods? Will a bunch of women PM me if I do?
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  21. #21
    cameron_keys
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Quote Originally Posted by Circe View Post
    I always find it odd when people refer to oral as not "real sex" Like, to quote Dan Savage "You're rolling around on a bed, giving each other orgasms...what the fuck is it, parcheesi?"

    Ahahahaha....
    I <3 Dan Savage! He cracks me up!

    I KNOW I gave WAY more BJ's then I have had actual sex. It was a way to be intimate and please a guy without losing my technical virginity when i was a teenager. Odd that having a mouthfulof baby batter was somehow LESS slutty then getting pounded.
    Hell..I know girls who had anal before vagnal sex to remain a technical virgin! What we let society talk us into.....

  22. #22
    Alaska
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Quote Originally Posted by The Other Owner View Post
    Actually, it's pretty damn awful shit, but you knew that already. How can editors not spot the difference between forced, overwrought, cheesy, lame writing like "the salty swell of seed-bearing spermatozoa" and the other side of the world where real erotica resides? There is a very thin line between hysterically funny and the genuinely erotic.


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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Quote Originally Posted by Andygirl View Post
    I think it's funny that she quoted "Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man," that's one of my favorite sex manuals.

    And I really hope she's exaggerating about the bj being the "goodnight kiss" for teenagers today. Not that there's anything wrong with it in and of itself, but you sure don't hear about the girl getting hers anywhere in there.
    From what I remember about teenage sex stuff the girl rarely gets hers until she hits an older age or learns to take it quick where she can!

    I've heard a few stories that make me think it is considered more like making out and less like sex than it did when I was a teen....
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    That article cracked me up! It was a tribute to "Well, back in my day..." type of article.

    Yep, and fellatio was illegal in most of the US until very recently. Can you imagine trying to enforce that law?
    Police Officer: "Ma'am, please remove his organ from your mouth and step away slowly with your hands in the air." Hahahahahaha!
    *I think the reason why it was illegal was to prevent prostitution and homosexual behavior.

    Fellatio is one of those rare situations where being submissive actually bestows more control and power to the one who is in the submissive role. Nothing wrong with that!


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    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
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    Default Re: What *IS* Fellatio?

    Are you sure it isn't still technically illegal?

    My guess is that most of those laws are still in the books, but being ignored. I hope I'm wrong, though.

    Most of those atavistic sex laws are better off just not being enforced, I think--in the view of legislators, police, and prosecuting attorneys. Much easier to simply ignore a dumb law that is more trouble than it's worth to enforce, than to go through the time, expense, and complication of repealing the law officially.

    The drawback, of course, being that the law is still conveniently there if some crusading sex-police types decide people shouldn't have any fun unless they are married, in their bedroom, and in the Missionary position (for procreation purposes only!).

    Like the law in Daytona (state, local, I'm not sure) that prohibits dancers from wearing less clothing than the typical 1950's bathing suit. I wish I had a copy of the illustration they had up in one club's dressing room, it was a joke--except not a joke at all--they all had to follow the guidelines. They are currently trying to get that law enforced again, and last I heard they were winning.


    Sorry, I don't mean to turn MadMaxine's excellent thread into a political/legal issues battle.
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